“For now he knew
what Shalimar knew:
If you surrendered to the air,
you could ride it.”
–Toni Morrison, The Song of Solomon
you can go through the motions,
you can be feeling half of nowhere.
you can sit still, listening, watching, learning,
you can see–or not–
a way from here to there.
you can put your sore back into it (or don’t),
you can fade into a shell, undone,
you can reckon with yourself, in silence,
you can work to earn back grace and tone;
space and home; place and known.
you can still wish to add to the world,
you can still sit home designing happy returns,
you can regret and redeem; plus from a negative verb,
you can research, sink in, live
what you’ve learned from what you’ve learned.
And then you smash your motherfucking silences.
And then you take on the things you’ve done.
And then you stand, finally, speak for something and someone(s).
And then you pay up in full every due you owe.
And then you’ve offered heart and mind at the same time,
and then you trust the things you know.
And then it’s
Then it’s finally.
“The twenty years had been to him as one night.”
–Washington Irving, Rip Van Winkle.